Saturday, January 19, 2019. Communication between The Musician and I had completely stopped by this point (his girlfriend was back); but Vic and I were still attending his birthday party at Petty the following evening.
I got Raptor tickets from my cousin Eric last minute. I decided to take Vic since we always have good times at games together. We took the train downtown, hit the LCBO and chugged a few tall boys in Union Station’s newly renovated cafeteria.
Vic had a mickey of Jameson snuggled into his glove to smuggle into the game. We got into the ACC early; bought more beer and did a tour before heading to our seats. Vic had a habit of bumping into people he knew when we were out and about and this evening was no different. Among those we ran into was Goose and his brother, The Hobbit. I knew Goose through Vic and their B-Boy crew, but had never met his brother. The three of them hugged and made plans to meet up for drinks after the game.
Vic and I bought a Sprite to drink with the JMO and grabbed more beer. The game was great, and by the time it was finished, I was shit-faced. I browned out. It’s not as severe as a black out because I remembered bits and pieces (Mac, season 6. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia).
Here is what I remembered:
- Being at the game and celebrating the win
- Next, my drunk ass was sitting on a bar stool at Real Sports and I saw Goose and The Hobbit walk in
- The next time I came to consciousness (albeit brief), I was sucking face with The Hobbit at a different bar
- Finally…I woke up with my head in his lap in front of a fireplace
I immediately panicked and did the “drunk” pat down – where, in one simultaneous and fluid motion, I looked down and grasped my tits, ass, etc. to see if I was clothed with bra and panties intact. I did a quick check of my surroundings; realized that I was in unfamiliar territory, but breathed a sigh of relief when I realized that I was not likely in imminent danger.
I scanned the immediate area for purse/phone/shoes and the man I went home with.
I relaxed when I was fully aware that we were both completely clothed and had passed out on the couch.
He also awoke. It was 4am. I asked him what the fuck happened and where Vic was. He told me that we took an Uber to his place and Vic stayed with the other boys who we had met up with after the game. When we got back to his place I was apparently in my “let’s order some fucking food” mood. He tried, but Uber eats was not available.
I was confused, still drunk, but felt safe. I checked my purse and saw that I was in possession of Vic’s phone and house keys, so I couldn’t even text him; but at that point it didn’t even matter. I just wanted to go back to sleep so I asked the kind Hobbit for a pair of jogging pants. He obliged.
I slept on his couch in front of the fire and he went upstairs to his bedroom. I did not want to sleep in his bed.
I woke up later that morning feeling regret and utterly hungover. I wished so badly to be in my own bed.
The Hobbit heard me stir and came downstairs in just boxer briefs. I got a good look at him in the light of day. He was cute. I wasn’t a fan of the beard and he was shorter than expected. We chatted a bit and he invited me to lay down in his bed. I felt like a pile of shit and could use more rest, so I agreed.
When we started heading upstairs, he immediately put both hands behind him with fingers splayed toward me. Ugh. Too soon; but I was still drunk, so I reached out and held his hand for the purpose of maintaining balance.
We kind of spooned for a couple of hours and I say sort of because I just felt like a bigger presence in bed than he did; so it was awkward to me.
His bed was super comfortable. My mind was in a fog. I just really wanted to be home.
Just before noon I mustered enough strength to head home. He was nice enough to drive me to the Go station.
I asked where we were. Answer = Etobicoke.
It was fucking freezing out; one of those minus 20 days. It helped sober me up quick. I thanked him for the drive and we kissed.
Again, I thought he was cute and all, but so not my type.
When I got home, Vic was on the snowy sidewalk. The timing was impeccable. He had just gotten out of his Uber. That motherfucker was lucky because I had his house keys and mom wasn’t home. I parked on the street since there was a foot of snow on the driveway, and we went into the house.
I asked Vic to fill in the details of the night. He said one minute the Hobbit and I were talking and the next minute, we were sucking face. We had left Real Sports to go to Laylow. Vic was so annoyed with my drunken make-out antics that he tried to get me in an Uber to head home.His boys did not want Vic to cock-block the Hobbit and I. His brother, Goose, really wanted us to “seal the deal”, so he did everything in his power to prevent Vic getting me home. (I wish he had).
Silly Poppy…why must I get so fucking drunk?!
I only remember kissing him for a split second. I cannot even imagine how grotesque my make out was for those around us, especially to my brother!
Anyway, after the quick update, we went to our respective rooms until the following day.
The Hobbit messaged me at some point that day to see if I got home ok. I didn’t remember giving him my number.
A couple of days later, he asked me out to dinner.
Vic was really good friends with the Hobbit’s brother and knew the Hobbit well. His description of him was that he was a really nice/good guy and super nerdy.
I thought, what the hell? He seemed to be the opposite of all of the guys that had thus far graced my dating roster.
I had nothing to lose.
Silly Poppy.
I told the girls about what had transpired and that I had a date thing with him later that week. They liked the prospect of the “nice guy”.
Thursday, January 24, 2019. When the day came, I was looking forward to meeting up with him; but I wasn’t excited. I was more excited at the prospect of a free steak/lobster dinner.
There were no butterflies or anxious anticipation.
I met him at the Keg mansion. I hoped that through a sober lens, I would be pleasantly surprised and my excitement would grow.
First sober impression – he was cute, dressed well and he was shorter than anyone I had ever dated (roughly the same height as me, 5’3”).
He held every door for me and ensured that I walked ahead of him behind the hostess; considerate, gentlemanly.
He was 33. Single. Worked in IT. Owned a two-storey loft in Etobicoke. Three siblings. He was close with his family. He enjoyed going out, drinking and having a good time. He loved camping. He was a huge Blue Jays fan and enjoyed most sports. He seemed sweet.
Great on paper.
There were some silent moments; which I wasn’t used to since I am always the chatty one, but for some reason, I didn’t have it in me. During one of those quiet times, as I scanned the dining room, people-watching; I felt awkward and wasn’t having fun.
Maybe we were nervous? Maybe my subconscious was preoccupied with The Musician? The difference between the two was night and day.
Give this a chance, Poppy….it repeated in my mind. I was literally trying to convince myself to like this nice man.
Anyway, he asked what it was that attracted me to him that night; what enticed me to make out with him.
I felt immediate shame and laughed in my head.
I was honest. I told him that it wasn’t anything particular about him because I was so wasted, I didn’t recall much of the night and I didn’t have a real reason “why”.
This should have been a red flag for him.
I asked him the same question and he said he thought I was attractive, and he too was very drunk that night.
Good start.
I saw ourselves as being great friends. Not overs. Again, there was no chemistry, no fire, not even real joy. Was I putting too much pressure on this first date? I understand that everything doesn’t happen at once; but I needed to feel some sort of heat!
Red Flag – Ignoring the fact that I wanted to put this sweet guy in the “friend zone”
Silly Poppy.
He paid for dinner and he walked me to my car. We kissed and parted ways.
He was a good kisser.
I reflected on my way home, as I usually did after going out with a guy.
Pros:
- He had his shit together.
- Vic was good friends with him and his family.
- He was sweet.
- He seemed genuine.
- He was a gentleman.
- He was the opposite of anyone I had dated in the last two years.
Again, great on paper.
Cons:
- I wasn’t that attracted to him
- There was no chemistry
- He was great on paper
Fuck it. He seemed to be one of the “nice guys”; he could be exactly what I needed.
Friday, January 25, 2019. I woke up still unsure if I wanted to see The Hobbit again. I went to work and made my daily office rounds to J-Cat and Lady G. They were hopeful for this one. They liked that he was “sweet”. They were also curious about how my night was going to go since I had The Musician’s birthday thing that evening.
After work I took a power nap and got ready. Vic and I had two birthday parties to attend; first it was Petty Cash for The Musician and then another bar for Shers’ birthday.
We met up with Sher, Ry and Paddington at the Go Station. Once we arrived at Union, Sher and Ry went to have dinner together and Vic, Paddington and I went to Petty. Following the personal humiliation of watching The Musician and his girlfriend sing beautifully together (please read the details of this event in the previous post “The Musician…Part 1”), I chugged down my drink and the three of us left to meet with Sher and Ry.
I was so shook by how shitty I felt seeing The Musician and his girlfriend together that I decided in that tipsy moment that I needed to leave the short saga of The Musician behind me and look forward to the future.
I called The Hobbit and invited him to meet up with us. He was wrapping up dinner with friends and met up with me afterward.
I was excited to see him. He was what I needed; single, cute and he seemed to have his fucking shit together.
We laughed and drank the night away. He was louder and chattier than expected, which was nice. He wasn’t shy or timid. I thought that was cool. I still couldn’t get over his beard/mustache combo, but it wasn’t a deal breaker.
As the night wrapped up everyone was figuring out how they were getting home. The GO train was no longer running so the only other option was to Uber. Vic went home with some chick, Sher and Ry hitched a ride with cousins and The Hobbit offered that I sleep at his place. I told him that nothing was going to happen and I would need some things from the pharmacy.
We jumped in an Uber and headed to a Shoppers by his place. I was still unsure, I just wasn’t attracted to him. He was cute, but so not my type. I grabbed some makeup remover, a toothbrush, hair elastics and face wash. He paid for it which was sweet.
Ugh. Poppy, what art thou doing?
We made out on the couch. He was a really good kisser. We didn’t go further than that.
Red Flag – I went home with a guy and was so not into him that all I wanted to do was make out.
Nothing happened in the morning. We laid in bed and talked for a bit. He offered to drive me home which again, was really sweet. Vic texted asking for a ride, but he was out of the way.
I met up with Cheese that night for wings. I told her the details of what was going on. When I told her that he wasn’t at all my type, she just encouraged me to do whatever I felt was right.
At this point, I didn’t know what was right.
New Term:
Brown out: an alcohol-induced fragmentary blackout
